This may have happened to you. And you may have seen this great article on Ataxia in The Guardian. If not, read on.

When my best friend Judy turned 40, she organised a group of us to fly to New York. As the plane was ready to take off, three members of security approached me. “Madam, we’d like to escort you off the plane,” the manager said. “We think you’ve had too much to drink.” “Honestly, I haven’t had a drop,” I protested. They apologised and left me – but I wanted the plane to swallow me up. It had been the same situation when I arrived at the boarding gate, feeling tired and a little dizzy. “Excuse me, have you been drinking?” a cabin attendant asked. She wouldn’t even let me on board without inspecting my bottle of water and my breath. The truth is I drink very little alcohol nowadays, but people often assume I’m drunk.

I think we need t-shirts…